Cosmetic Surgery

I have waited such a long time.  8 years!  I've saved.  I have suffered.  I am ready.  The time has finally arrived for my oral surgery.  They are calling me a "case study".  As I understand it, I have an unusually small mouth, (I have been told the opposite), and a special procedure must be performed.  This all will be "videoed", for them.  For my part, then, I will only be charged half-price...about $12,000.  All out of pocket, because, this is considered a "cosmetic" surgery.  I would argue that point, if it would be heard by anyone who gave a damn.  Personally, I consider eating a necessary component to living, but, hey, that's just me.  Anyway, that is how it is classified by the insurance company...

So, cosmetic surgery....I think of breast augmentations, eye-lifts, and nose jobs.  So, yeah..breasts.  Are they necessary for survival?  Well, that depends, I guess.  And augmentation could improve others' outlook of me...but survival?  And eyes...do we really need to see?  Guess not.  When you are something like 100, the insurance company will consider this necessary surgery for good eyesight.  But, any earlier---cosmetic!  Bogus!  But...noses, breathing equals survival.  A nose job---cosmetic.  Oh, unless you have something like a deviated septum.  Ok, that one probably is unnecessary otherwise.  Fine lines maybe..

I am trying to make a point.  Not all these procedures should automatically be considered unnecessary.  But that's how the insurance companies do it nowadays.  Somebody sitting at a desk with a red marker, scratches a big "Nope" on your request....

Insurance companies have become our enemies.  Greedy.  For all the premiums, I have paid through the years, I could have that nice vacation resort home on the Caribbean side of Mexico.  Oh, wait, somebody does have my vacation home---it's someone in upper management of the insurance company.   

Throwing oral surgery into the class of cosmetic surgeries is unfair.  This is so expensive!  Let's see, do I buy a new car, or do I have oral surgery?  I could have two breast augmentations (4 boobs) for my half-cost dental work.  I could have two nose-jobs for the same money.  I could have two eye-lift surgeries (4 eyes), for what this is going to cost.....Wouch!

Ok, breathe.  Just letting go of some thoughts..  I have no power over this...

This procedure is something I am so excited about.  It will take six months to heal, to complete.  Let's get this show on the road!!  ...oh, and do you take a check?  How 'bout my firstborn?